Can’t Stop the Changes
We say that the only sure thing in life is that it will change. These changes, welcome or not, can range from the tiniest ones, like waves gently lapping at our feet, all the way to shifts that hit like a tsunami. For me last fall, the sea of change was gentle. Life was rolling along easily, and it felt good. Stay in this moment and enjoy this feeling I told myself, but no one can stop the natural flow of life. There were rumblings, concerns. I watched. I tried not to worry, but the tsunami hit with life altering force.
While these changes were not personally happening to me, they were happening to those I love. All I could do was watch and support them in any way I could, but there was little I could do to help. It was so painful at times that I was swallowed up by the sadness, and then my own body began to react to the stress and one stress piled upon another.
The Message
I kept trying to work my way out of the fear and sadness using all the tools I knew how to use. This went on for weeks, and the moments of respite were few and far between. While lying awake one night unable to sleep, I heard, “Leave the door open.” I understood instantly that this was a message from my dear sweet Kate, my 13-year-old greyhound who had passed several months before.
Some might have considered Kate a bit odd, but I always identified with her. She loved her privacy spending many hours sleeping in the bedroom away from the other dogs and me. A couple times each day, however, she would bound down the hallway, pounce her front paws in my lap, look me straight in the eyes, and instantly I would feel her love and joy for life. Then off she would go as if the moment had never happened, leaving me smiling.
When she passed, I don’t even remember being able to grieve for her. The sadness and pain was so great that I pushed all thoughts and memories of her away. A few months after her passing, I was asked to do a reading with a senior dog whose time to cross over was near. Lying awake that night thinking about doing this reading, knowing how important it was, I found myself asking for a little extra help and guidance. Suddenly I thought, “Katie, you could help me. You were such an old and sensitive soul.” With that, I saw words curling from the back of my head, past my right ear, and into my vision, “Then you need to let the feelings go.” I knew immediately what this meant. In order to work with Katie, I would have to let her in and let go of the pain.
I then drifted off to sleep. Soon I was dreaming about my future plans to redo my front yard, and the job was such a mess that I simply shut the front door on it and went to bed. My mom then showed up in my bedroom saying something about my father that I thought had been resolved. I got up out of my bed to sit with my mom on the floor, and as I did, there came Katie bounding around the end of the bed! Unlike the fuzzy images of the dream, she was clear, solid, and vivid. I could feel her presence, her living energy, and instantly I was enveloped in her joy. I heard, “You called me!” I was about to ask my mom if she saw Kate too but waved off the thought knowing Kate was real, but my mom was just a dream. I had finally opened the door for my Kate, and she had come. My heart was full.
So on this more recent night when I heard those words, “leave the door open,” I knew it came from Kate. In the depths of darkness, we must still find a way to leave the door open to hope, healing, and joy. When we remain open, when we ask for help, it will appear.
And Yet Another Message
I recently purchased a new deck of Denise Linn oracle cards. They sat for a week before I even felt like opening the box, but the other night I finally did. When I removed the box top and the information booklet inside, the card staring out at me read, “Accepting what is.” Gee thanks, I thought, but what if I don’t want to?
I comforted myself with the thought that these cards are boxed in alphabetical order. This was not a real “message.” So I prepared the deck and then shuffled several times, spread out the cards, and ran my hands over them to see what card pulled me in. I drew one. Can you guess??? Yep, I pulled “Accepting what is.” At that point I figured I had two choices, get angry because I didn’t want to hear that or think about how the message might help me. I read the booklet for information about the card and drew hope from the words that while you accept what is, it does not mean that things can’t change.
All we can do at any given moment is accept what is. We have to learn when to surrender and let life take its course and when to take action to move life forward in a positive direction. We must remember to keep our thoughts hopeful, allow others to help us, and to find peaceful moments even in the midst of chaos, fear, and sadness.
I’m breathing a bit easier now. Hope is rising even in the face of recent challenges. Life is changing and will continue to change, but I will remember to leave the door open for the joy that is always waiting to enter.