Finding the pot of gold lurking in the background of grief can be a challenge. Under normal conditions, I am quite the determined spirit. I will dig unwaveringly through a sale bin to find my size, feeling like a hunting and gathering success. But when it comes to aligning with the good in the thick of my own heavy emotional space, not so easy! Lately it seems that I have temporary amnesia when it comes to remembering the insightful self-healing and personal enrichment classes that I have taught over the last decade. So I decided to create an owner’s manual for navigating life’s emergencies. I call it my GPS System, Guiding Path to Sanity, and it is filled with great quotes, tools, and helpful activities to remember when navigating the bumpy, inward terrain.
Here are some excerpts from my manual that may help you restore a sense of peace while experiencing any type of loss.
Give to Others
Sure we all know that in the giving you receive so much, but what about the days when you feel like you have absolutely nothing to offer? That’s when you really need to do it the most. Find something, anything kind or thoughtful you can say or do for another. Maybe you can make a greeting card, a picture book, a home-cooked meal or baked goodie. If you are feeling a lack of energy or purpose, I assure you, you still have something to offer to another. How about writing a check to your favorite charity, paying for a cup of coffee for the person in line behind you or just complimenting a stranger? Sometimes lending your ear to really listen to what is going on in somebody else’s life would mean the world to them and at the same time give you a mental break from your own stressful situation.
Do Whatever It Takes to Make You Smile
I remember a scene from the movie The Secret where a woman diagnosed with cancer gave herself a prescription to laugh. She made it a point to only watch funny movies and read things that made her smile. This one was difficult for me, especially in the earlier stages of grief. I thought how could I possibly smile and wouldn’t that be disrespectful at a time like this? I knew deep down that my horse in spirit would not want me to mope around for too long, so I began by looking at cute animal stuff on the internet. I progressed to laughing at my husband’s jokes. As that was the first time I really smiled in over a week, I noticed the endorphin release instantly. They say our brain is the best pharmacy in the world. I believe it!
Practice What You Preach
I have always believed in looking for the silver lining in every situation. Ah, the clichés that ran my life so effortlessly for so long:
Everything happens for a reason.
It is all in divine timing.
What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.
All is well.
However, after going through my dark night of the soul, I got a chance to rekindle my relationship with some these mantras on a much more profound level. And in the moments that I wasn’t doing that, I had friends and family (also known as karma) reminding me of my teachings!
To Ponder:
What quotes uplift or inspire you? What are some of your own internal wisdoms? Could you ask your friends what catch phrase or mantra they hear you say often? Would you consider creating your own GPS manual to help you create balance under stress? What if you didn’t wait until you were grieving to practice some of these activities?